“Its the hard days — the days that challenge you to your very core — that determine who you are. You will be defined not just by what you achieve, but how you survived.” — Sheryl Sandberg
In 2020, our world spent most of its time doing an out-of-character, circus-style headstand. It has also been a year which many of us have experienced COVID-19 related and unrelated loss, fear, anxiety, depression, anger etc. in different aspects of our lives. Consequently, our physical health, mental health, emotional health, friendships, relationships, marriages, jobs, businesses and society have all been stretched to their limits and in many instances, these have given way.
In spite of all the drama in the year 2020, I believe as we turn the page, we need to band together to adjust our collective lenses for better perspective and subsequent action in 2021 and beyond. I truly believe in the concept of the universal brain and of collective wisdom so I will put forward my thoughts in the form of a Gratitude-Perseverance-Hope framework and wish you all can combine it with your own perspectives to make the journey ahead more enjoyable and fulfilling with loads of insights to look back on by this time next year.
GRATITUDE
“When life is sweet, say thank you and celebrate. When life is bitter, say thank you and grow.” — Shauna Niequist
Hedonic adaptation is a thing. It is the tendency of human beings to quickly return to the consciousness level they are used to despite the occurrence of major positive or negative events or life changes. This keeps us perpetually dissatisfied and unhappy. I decided to be more aware of this tendency and act accordingly. Recently, I started consciously taking stock and found that I actually have a lot more material and immaterial wealth than I acknowledge. Firstly, I do have a lot of material things — much more things than I need for this my simple life and living. I am also generally in a good financial position with good “credit scores” everywhere. I have a comfortable roof over my head and I can eat and drink whatever I like. Let’s say I am a resident on the higher rungs of Maslow’s Hierarchy. For these I am thankful. Importantly though, I must acknowledge the roles of the seen and unseen hands of my family, friends and even strangers all through my journey. I would not be where I am without the copious amounts of unmerited help I have received. I cannot stress that enough. Material things aside, I have also come to realise that I have a lot of diverse family and friends. I am thankful for all of my family — imperfections, warts and all. I am thankful for all the friends that present themselves to me as family members, school-mates, co-workers, co-venturers and co-mischief makers through this journey of life. I truly believe life has been sweet and can be sweeter with the support of friends — for serious things and for enjoyment alike so I will be more intentional in cultivating and nurturing great friendships going forward. I am also thankful for the source of wealth which is me. Yes, me. Modesty forbids me to toot my own horn but I just have to throw it in. I am thankful for the gift of intellect. Genius or Polymath, whatever it is I was born with or that I have become, I am thankful for it and I intend to use it to its full capacity in the future.
Going into 2021, I will practice more gratitude. I believe gratitude is important for grounding oneself, appreciating the journey so far and for managing one’s talents, skills and expectations for the journey ahead.
PERSEVERENCE
“We must free ourselves of the hope that the sea will ever rest. We must learn to sail in high winds.” — Aristotle Onassis
Let us take COVID-19 for example. Even with the development and deployment of the numerous vaccines, it might be with us for much longer (think Flu, Cholera, HIV/AIDS etc). With this in mind, are we going to continue living in fear and trembling? Would we continue indulging in debilitating mass hysteria? Likewise, with the other personal non-COVID battles we might be fighting at our jobs, businesses or relationships, do we intend to throw our hands up in despair? Are our issues unique? Can we learn from our past experiences and the experiences of others? I believe we can reframe these issues whilst we seek out possible solutions to (or manoeuvres around) everything that weighs us down. The way I like to look at it is that, in different ramifications, I have persevered and thrived against all odds. Often, it helps me to recount all the times where I had to push through seemingly closed tunnels and doors. This gives me a bit of a champion complex but it does make sense to me. For example, long, long ago, I struggled with my spermatozoa comrades. I persevered and emerged a winner. I have countless other examples of situations where perseverance has seen me through — at school, at work, in business and in personal life. 2021 is a year where I would be experiencing new and unfamiliar things and also when I will be clocking a few milestone achievements. It is a year when I do recognise that perseverance is a required thing. As such, I will be channeling all my passion and resilience to do better at ensuring that I see things through without fear or procrastination.
Going into 2021, I will continue to summon and use strength, courage and wisdom to make decisions and persevere in all my endeavours.
HOPE
“A man begins to die when he ceases to expect anything from tomorrow.” — Abraham Miller.
What does the future hold? I wonder! My Catholic upbringing taught me that to despair is a sin, a sin against the Holy Spirit. Somehow that stuck. I believe we will collectively beat COVID-19 and its attendant issues. If for some reason, we are not able to eradicate it and it stays on, I believe humanity will find ways to live with it. We are a resilient species. I can only hope we go through this soon.
Today, as I officially become 41 years old on this 31st day in December, I look forward to the year 2021 with so much hope. It is the year when I hope to become my authentic self and live in my truth. It is the year when I hope to find the best blend for my family life, work life, academic life and play life. It is the year when I hope to embark on the next phase of my journey through life — living a life of service. I hope to touch as many lives as I can with the many gifts I have and those I can create along the way.
Borrowing from the words of Paulo Coelho, in 2021 and beyond, let us all aspire to live fully, love deeply and let go (of the ills of 2020 and every other thing that needs letting go) with no bitterness. I hope we all live through 2021 to be able to look back and be thankful for the year we were able to create internally and externally.
Happy New Year.
Odiong